THE INTERNET IS DYING…

Be like the Pope and have Proton: https://proton.me/dylanpage

THIS WEEK ON NEWSSDADDYYY!! 🍿🥤

**THE INTERNET IS DYING? — AI WROTE MORE ARTICLES THAN HUMANS**

Oxford? Graphite? Perplexity? The original post said “THE INTERNET IS DYING” after a chart showed AI-GENERATED ARTICLES now outnumber human ones. Wild headline — but the truth is messier: the chart comes from an SEO firm (Graphite) using AI detectors, and those detectors admit they’re imperfect. Even so — the trend is real enough to freak people out: AI content spiked after ChatGPT’s launch, but how much of it actually gets READ (vs just published) is a whole other story. KEYWORDS: AI GENERATED CONTENT, CHATGPT, MODEL COLLAPSE, GRAPHITE.

**PENGUINZ0 — I’M TURNING IT OFF? (…then the receipts)**

Charlie (Penguinz0) dropped a video saying he was turning donations off — then followed up showing jaw-dropping Twitch + YouTube earnings. Guy’s got 17M+ subs, millions of views per upload, and a decade of hustle — low production, massive reward. Moral: consistency + audience beats expensive sets. If you’re grinding on YouTube, this one’s a masterclass and a reminder: patience pays. KEYWORDS: PENGUINZ0, YOUTUBE EARNINGS, ADREVENUE.

**MR BEAST BANK? — JIMMY MOVE INTO FINANCE**

Yep — filings and reporting suggest Jimmy’s exploring a financial play (trademark filings for “MrBeast Financial” and investor materials showing a mobile banking / crypto angle). Imagine cashback for buying Feastables, entry-to-win mechanics when you spend, or a Beast debit/credit card — creator economics meets fintech. For now it’s paperwork and speculation, but this could be a creator business model lesson: PRODUCT + BRAND + FINANCE = next level monetisation. KEYWORDS: MRBEAST, FINTECH, TRADEMARK.

**PENTAGON WALKOUT — REPORTERS RETURN BADGES**

Huge media moment: dozens of Pentagon correspondents handed back badges after refusing to sign new reporting rules that would restrict publishing unapproved material. Big outlets (left + right) pushed back, calling it a threat to press freedom — the DoD says it’s about NATIONAL SECURITY. This one’s got constitutional vibes — and it’s a major newsroom united front you don’t see every day. KEYWORDS: PRESS FREEDOM, PENTAGON, REPORTERS WALKOUT.

**MUSLIMS IN THE VATICAN — A PRAYER ROOM?**

The Vatican now has a prayer space for visiting Muslim scholars inside the Apostolic Library — some call it interfaith progress, others say it’s controversial given restrictions in places like Mecca. Either way, it’s a headline that sparks debate about religion, diplomacy and hypocrisy. KEYWORDS: VATICAN, INTERFAITH, MUSLIM PRAYER ROOM.

**MAYOR OF SKID ROW — LOCAL SOLUTIONS**

Meet Kevin — once homeless, now the unofficial “mayor” of Skid Row cleaning streets and pushing mental-health first responses. This is grassroots action top-down PR. If you want the human headline of the week, this is the one. KEYWORDS: HOMELESSNESS, SKID ROW, COMMUNITY ACTION.

**SUPERWOOD — WOOD STRONGER THAN STEEL**

Science flex: researchers re-engineered natural wood (chemical + heat + compression) into a material WAY stronger and MUCH lighter than before. Could be a gamechanger for buildings and earthquake resilience. KEYWORDS: SUPERWOOD, MATERIALS SCIENCE, EARTHQUAKE RESISTANT.

**WORLD’S LONGEST NAME — GWR RECORD**

Laurence Watkins (goes by Laurence) legally changed his name to 2,253 words — takes 20 MINUTES to recite — now officially in Guinness. Perfect feelgood/weird internet content. KEYWORDS: GUINNESS WORLD RECORDS, LONGEST NAME.

NEWSMADDY PRESENTS A POEM!!!

00:00 – Introducing
00:58 – THE INTERNET IS DYING
04:30 – PENGUINZ0
09:33 – BEAST BANK
11:57 – RETURN OF RELIGION?
13:34 – THE POPE IS GIVEN A HORSE…
15:34 – THE PENTAGON PRESS
17:46 – SKIDROW MAYOR
20:01 – DO YOU HAVE SUPERWOOD?
21:50 – LONGEST NAME
23:58 – NEWWSSSS MADDDDYYYYYYY